Friday, August 31, 2007
Various solutions were put forward, the best of these being that marshall would have to work forever (cuz he is too stupid to get a good job) to pay it off, selling a few organs, robbing a bank, robbing Seb FM, beating Seb FM and my personal favorite, chopping the squid into calamari and selling him.
The only problem was none of these seemed to be viable options, or would take too much effort on Marshals part, even though i offered to chop the squid up free of charge. Don't fret Marshal I have found the solution. I have managed to find a site that gives people like you Auto Loans. They offer the best deals and even give credit to those who would otherwise struggle to get it. They offer helpful tips for first time buyers and help with insurance too.
So marsh, rather chat to these guys and leave the chopping up of squids to me. In fact I think we will chop the Squid up anyway, or at least his fingers/tentacles!
Thursday, August 30, 2007
But what they big wigs at Maties rugby didn't realise was that just because the second game to be played at the Danie Craven wasn't officially called "Intervarsity" doesn't mean that UCT students wont go out in their droves and add to the GDP of Stellenbosch.
Wednesday, August 29, 2007
Here is an Online Dating website that will give you all the helpful hints and ways to get over your nervousness, all the do's and dont's. My only regret is that I did not find this website in time to help Sean Carey from 'maring' and having to ask a date at '5pm day of' to last years Nadoes Formal. They help lost souls find love online and help with long distance relationships.
For those who cant find their own dates, they will help even the siffest of okes come right with there match finder. It remains to be seen if they are amazing enough to help Bob PecanNut with his on-again off-again but is now on-again relationship with the lovely Maria Siverstedt.
Jambles will be hard at work honing his skills on his laptop playing 'world series of poker 5'. Brokeback King will be playing with Pascale. For everyone else who does not have a laptop or a partner, there is Golden Palace Casino. It is an interactive online poker website which doubles as a casino. It runs specials all the time for sign up bonuses and the like. It would be a good option for all of those that have not been skilled enough to win on the SilverSands freerolls. The Site can be viewed in English as well as Spanish and French for all our European competitors. It has help guides and tutorials to help out even the worst of players.
Nic Maconac might well need to check it out to sharpen his game after his long lay off due to injury. He was suffering from smoke inhalation. Our thoughts go out to him and the Playroom wishes him the best.
Tuesday, August 28, 2007
Monday, August 27, 2007
Online betting has taken the Cape Town and Jambles's spare time by storm. Its all the man does. You too can become a poker genius with this helpful site. It has Top poker and sportsbetting guides and reviews. You can bet on anything at anytime. Its all the betting you could ever want rolled into one! I reckon you could even bet on whether Craig will marry Selina, Melissa or Marshall. Or if they will change the law and allow all of them to marry each other. Or if Sean will eat until he bursts. Anything is possible.
Whatever your game, be it rugby, cricket, horse racing poker or football, this is the place for you. Jambles will now probably never leave the house. They will triple their revenue, I should ask for some commision.
Sunday, August 26, 2007
You have got to love beauty pagents. In order to show that they are not all about looks (why that would be a problem I don't know), they ask "a thought-provoking" question to the beautiful ladies in contention near the end of the compo.
Well this lady, who by the looks of things must have been on of the favourites going into the question round, absolutely pawned it.
She must have walked backstage and wanted to bury herself in a deep hole!
I did like her exam techniqe of repeating the question so as to buy herself some time, but sometimes exam technique alone just doesn't cut it.
She still would have been my winner though!
With this in mind, I stumbled across a site selling Soccer Nets and various items of soccer apparel. This will be perfect for the Koekenda as the site sells training equipment including portable goals and rebounders. They will be well aware of the fact that they have never beaten the Playroom franchise (Rondebosch FC as it was known before the buyout) and will need all the help they can get to do so.
These soccer nets are easy to assemble and are portable so they can be used on the go and assembled with the greatest of ease, so as not to cut into their precious training time. They even offer delivery for a small fee to add to the ease.
The Sporting Koekende should take a look at this site and the helpful products it has to offer. Lets be honest, they need all the help they can get.
Thursday, August 23, 2007
I hate to push down the lovely young lass below down the page for a political message, but I think that is exactly what the "Good Party" isn't - a political message. Two of our mates are running for SRC ('Student Representative Council' for anyone more apathetic then me) at UCT next week, James Robertson (left) and Nic Rosslee (by process of elimination, right).
Did that surname ring a bell? Tin Roof.... Cockroach..... Upside down..... Yip that's the one.
I don't want to rap on about what they're all about (I think that is their job), but I think the name gives away a large part of their game plan! I feel these two could offer us a lot more than the politically associated monkey's that are running the same race. Everyone knows that these political clowns are going to get onto the 15 man council, so let's help Nic and James get into this council so they can give them a hard time!
Any registered student this year can vote on Vula or can vote on campus. And remember these guys? Who would have thought?
[The views expressed in this article are the views of the writer and do not necessarily reflect those of "The Good Party" or "The Playroom"]
So may I present to you the innaugural Playroom Wednesday Woman to you...drumroll please... Scarlett Johansson.
I know its a thursday and thus im a little late. Im Sorry, I hope you forgive me it took a bit of time for me to sort out the photos from my camera. You see Scarlett and I had a dinner date last night and the rest of the photos were not suitable to publish!
Tuesday, August 21, 2007
The event that thousands have been waiting for is here. The innaugural PlayroomPoker tournament. Professional poker players from all over Cape Town will be battling for the most sought after prize in Poker.
Due to a logistical nightmare, we have decided to make it a a one off affair.We will play 'Silversands style' until we have only 1 left, who will take the main cash prize, the Playroom Poker Title and bragging rights.
- Buy In: R50
- Texas Holdem
- Date: Sunday 9nd Sep
- Payout: The Top 6 players will get paid
- Venue will be announced to you once you have confirmed.
There will be cost price beers (or you can bring your own) and a vibe for the players and spectators. Leave a comment if you are interested in playing or email me at firstname.lastname@example.org or Facebook me! All are welcome, the more the merrier. The more we get, the bigger the cash prizes will be. Please confirm so we can get an idea of numbers so we can sort out chips and cards ect. The boys are amped! Its on.
I came across this individual walking between upper campus and Kramer. Clad in his dressing gown he exuded coolness. It seemed to emanate from him like light from the sun. Stay free. Don't conform to the standards of modern living. Don't let 'the Man' get you. Scuttle back to your burrow in the woods and keep fighting the good fight.
August brings with it the birthday of a very special individual. His name is Guy Thompson. This site has a wide range of themed Kids Pajamas. They make all the NFL kits to fit even the smallest of kiddies. These custom kids sets are so special that they even let you print a number on the back!! Amazing! (I happened to have it on very good authority that Guys favorite number is 7). But probably the most important piece of information is that they make shoulder pads in tyke sizes. This will be of great help to Guy as he looks to make his return to the Rugby fields. Sizes range from 4yrs - 10yrs. The sets are very reasonably priced so the birthday seasons budget will not be blown in one go.
This site will also be of use to you if you are attending a Wynberg girls 21st because her kid(standard issue) would be between the ages of 4 and 6. Give or take a few months here or there.
"I would like to appeal and rescind what was stated about last weeks Koekenda game.
There was no cruising whatsoever, and Mr. McEnroe was asked on repeated accounts to lower his voice and refrain from such foul profanity on Kelvin Groove's Center Court. He found himself being more careful with his final racket, after throwing his other three into the crowds.
The Playroom struck it lucky, Sky Flint's ankle injury from his previous weeks lion hunting had left him unable to play."
Monday, August 20, 2007
This is an urgent plea to anyone who has news of the actions of this individual in question. Since returning from the shores of London, he has not been himself. Various sources have placed him at affluent night clubs in and aroung the Cape Town area and have seen him staying out till all hours of the morning. Many Sources have confirmed thatshould you venture out to tiger on a Tuesday or Thursday night, you might well see him sliding around the establishment uttering: "you are hot!" and "As if id score you!".
We have sent him much correspondence and even a few interviews. His camp has declined all attempts on our part to offer our help. The last straw was his refusal of the invitation to play in the Daly Cup on Sunday. Our Concern grows with every passing day. We are deeply worried that something terrible has happened to him. His behaviour has become erratic and his frequent bouts of drunken rage have become the norm. Is he in love? Has he contracted something from England?
Please if you have any information contact 1-800-BIGGEST-NAME, send an email to email@example.com, or just drop a comment. Your anonymity will be kept, of course.
Once the floor was cleared of people and about 4 meters squared of glass, Mr Rosslee proceeded to put an exhibition on! If you could tell the difference between him and the picture above, you could see better than I could at 4am in the Roof (not totally implausible). Only thing the routine was missing was the "Scat Man" pumping in the background.
It wasn't however in the execution of the actual dance moves where he performed what would generally be considered by many to be a rookie error - "loose pocket syndrome"! "Loose Pocket Syndrome" is largely a dormant disease in many claremont patrons, but becomes a nasty cash killer when lying on the floor. And as the above picture suggests, the upside down cockroach is all on the floor. 1+ 2 = lost cell cell phone.
So ladies and gentleman, keep your eyes open for this quite awesome dance move as well as the big guys phone.
Oh my fuck. This has made my day. Daniel Radcliffe, who plays Harry Potter in the Harry Potter movies has done some sort of sexy/vibey photoshoot for a mag called DETAILS. He has tried to push it a bit with this one. I think he should stop all this silly modelling business and stick to flying his broom. Oh and he should score Hermione (Emma Watson) and she should do a playboy shoot or make a homemade porn video. Is that too much to ask?
Friday, August 17, 2007
Thursday, August 16, 2007
The introduction of "Ching, Chong, Cha", or for our international readers "rock, paper, scissors" (why Saffa's feel the need to call it by its Asian translation I still cannot work out, but that is a whole nother can of worms!) into Test match rugby.
The coin toss in the in test match rugby has taken some what of a back seat since I was a young lad watching the game in the early 90's. You wouldn't even know that the toss even happens if you weren't as informed as all our readers are. I realise that the outcome of the toss doesn't quite have the same affect in rugby as in say cricket, but surely we could make more of it? The administrators are always adding new things to the game to try and enhance the entertainment and therefore value to the spectator, like dancing girls (note to reader - which I am not adverse to) or the Zulu war dance. Well you monkeys in rugby administration (sorry for the generalisation my northern hemisphere and antipodean counterparts), here is your chance!
Close your eyes and imagine John Smit and Richie McCaw standing on the halfway line in Paris staring each other down, trying to read the eyes of his opponent while at the same time trying to keep a blank face. And then the call comes over the loudspeaker, "Ching!", the crowd going quiet in anticipation. "Chong!", the excitement unbearable as a few of the unsavoury members of the crowd (the same ones who think that a moments silence is for them to bellow out a few drunken screams) break the atmosphere slightly. "Cha!", John Smit drawing out his favourite move, the jaw breaking rock. Meanstwhile had Richie predicted the inevitable and brought out the paperwork!
It surely could work! And imagine the build up in the press. It would be awesome! Mortlock throwing out at Thursdays press conference that he would be pulling out the scissors on Saturday, baffling the French tacticians. And imagine all the statisticians that would have a new lease on life with all the new variables that would be thrown around! Sites like SA Rugby would have whole articles on the match within a match.
Surely an idea that needs to be considered by the big wigs at the IRB!
This post has been entered into the SARugby.com World Cup Bloggers competition. Please support me by giving the post a rating.
The first is that Allenbrook has some new additions to the bag. He has enlisted the services of a King Cobra 9.0 driver to hopefully sort out his waywardness off the tee. But more importantly, he has a new 2-iron in the bag. We managed to snap a pic of his new 'baby' as he referred to it just before he began to hit it for the first time. OH MY GOD! He hits it fucking miles! It is truly amazing, 10 in a row dead straight, then back into the bag. The club in question is a Hogan Director blade 2-iron and can only be described as amazing.
Wednesday, August 15, 2007
The way it works at UCT is that in order to park on Campus, you need to fork over fuck loads of cash for a parking disk. You do this because you know that if you are caught, there is a nasty fine awaiting you, albeit that you dont actually have to pay, but thats not the point. You do on the odd occasion chance it and hope to get away with it, everybody has done it once or twice. It does however tweak the hell out of me that there are those people who seem to do it ad-nauseum and never seem to get caught.
The driver of this van is one of these people. He boasts endlessly about how his van is invincible and impervious to fines. It is for this reason that I am writing this article. Let me set the scene. Walking up the hill in the freezing cold, swearing, trying not to think about how far it still is to my lecture, keep walking, swearing, hating all these bastards who chance their luck everyday and never get caught, still swearing. Finally I get to the top, comlpletely bleak with life and the idea of a full day at varsity thinking that nothing in this world will ever be right and that nothing, even a blow job from Jessica Alba could bring me out of my bad mood. It was at this pivotal point in my life that i saw it.
I was amazed at how wrong i could have been, how my mood could be so hectically changed by a seemingly meaningless happeneing. How beautiful it was, fluttering its whiteness in the wind. My mood changed instantaneously as a wave of sheer jubilation swept over me. The day seemed so much brighter, so much warmer, i now had purpose, i wanted to go to accounts and as the clouds parted, i could swear that, just for a second, i saw god smiling at me and i could just make out what he was mouthing......'Take that you Cunt'.
Back to the website though, it is extremely user friendly, any old ‘Guy Thompson’ could figure his way around its user friendly design. It boasts hacker safe software thus making internet payment on this site easy and safe. It has a 4.5 star customer rating and a top service award from yahoo. You can also have your goods shipped to you no matter what the size of the order for a very low flat fee. This is no doubt a site that Jambles should visit to get all the new teaching aids for his kids at WPPS. In fact all coaches should take a look at the fantastic products on offer.
All in all a useful site for kids sport. You can arrange pretty much any sporting goods, but it is most concentrated on Baseball Equipment, from this site and if I had any kids that played sport instead of chess, I would not hesitate to make Kidssportsinc my number 1 stop!
Tuesday, August 14, 2007
Visit http://www.sarugby.com/ for more
Monday, August 13, 2007
Bet365 is the all round betting site, it caters for any and all online gamers and gamblers. It is possible to bet on any sports event imaginable, from cycling to Gaelic Sports. It is easy to use in that it has a wallet feature that lets you use your money across all its features.
It's online poker was especially interesting to me. It is better than any other online poker site I have ever used. It is efficient and easy to navigate. It is also easy on the eyes, which is often not the case with other online gaming sites. All you need is to download the software and you are ready to play for real money with thousands of players from all over the world. You can even use their 'Instant play flash Version' to play for play-play money, and thus learn the game without losing any money. There is also an excellent help guide to assist all first time players, as well as an instructional video and help guide.
In my opinion this would be a great site for anyone wishing to learn the game of poker and start playing online, or a seasoned professional looking for a new challenge. There is something here for everyone, this site covers for all types of betting.
Get started right now with this great online poker at Bet365.
Borg and McEnroe, pensive.
Sunday, August 12, 2007
It was a sensational putting performance and a great back 9 by S. Mortlock that insured that the coveted title was taken back to the quiet hamlet that is Sybrand Park. Pretty sure this quaint little village hasn't seen an honour like this bestowed upon it since Pagad made it the official "Home of the Movement". There will soon be a follow up story giving a more in depth review of Sybrand (Say'-brant) Park. Stirling won by 1 shot over Charles Sanderoff with Tim a shot further back. The rest of the field were enjoying the weather a bit too much to actually play golf I think.
Britain's Sun newspaper said on Thursday the singer had taken a drug overdose and that her stomach had been pumped.
As an opener I feel it's important to look holistically at what an average night at this “fine” establishment entails- from beginning till end!
Step 1: No true night out would be complete without the customary pre-match. This may consist of a few beers at a bar, a post match sports fines or just downing a good bottle of crackling within the comfortable confines of your home. Either way, the main goal of the situation is to get nicely pissed, send those enquiring SMS's without inhibiting thoughts, and start loosening up (in every sense of the phrase) for the night ahead.
Step 2: Somehow transport needs to be found to the establishment. This consists of finding the most sober person, or the guy who just doesn't give a shit, to get you to the place. Crucial components of this trip are; loud music (usually a good tin roof anthem does the trick), congested back-seat space, and a thorough knowledge of potential road-block sites. Arrival is marked with a quick spray of deo's and one last swig of the booze you brought in your plastic Valpre bottle!
Step 3: Entry must be swift and care free. The WADDA card comes in handy here as it gives a sense of importance, allows us to grab a random to come in with you as your partner (a potential drink-buyer), and saves valuable Jaegie money.
Step 4: Ideally the most pissed oke is the guy with the most money, coz he'll then go to the bar, do his 50 cent impression, flash around the bling bling and order a full round of Jaegies, plus a few more and everyone is on their way. Goal now is obviously- get pissed, score (if u single), try not look too much like a doos on the dance floor, or if you the Guru- just go for it anyway! Most of the night now is about a blur. You talk, you drink, you dance, you drink, you talk, you stumble a little, hug and back slap “mates” that you probably wouldn't even speak to if you were sober, and drink a bit more. All in a good night's WADDA action really. Of course, at least another few SMS's are sent if no luck is apparent on the lady front. But these are just courteous enquiries of course, a true gentleman would always enquire as to the lady's whereabouts- and of course offer her a lift home and 'free' accommodation for the evening!
Step 5: This happens at different times for different people. Leaving time depends on a few variables; are u out of money? Are you too pissed to talk any sense (in which case you always stay), do you have work the next day? Are you Gregg Gray? (be there for lights on time), has your enquiry sms received positive response (down a tequila and leave- it'll help!) or is it now time to go to the roof for winning hour?!
Step 6: Lift home time. Either you driving yourself, in which case you have drunk water for the last hour, which of course means you fine to drive, or you getting a lift with the girlfriend/sms girl/ mate's girlfriend/friend that's a girl (that could change now), or it's a disappointing end and straight to Barcellos/Starlite for the burger that is absolutely essential. Of course you have booked your table for 4 am so it would be rude not to turn up! Hopefully you manage to leave unscathed - without ordering only to find u have no cash, or flirting with another guy's bird, or going and making the burger's yourself (Gregg), or being ill on the floor in front of sms girl (sure to guarantee being dropped off at your own house). Then all that is left is to make it home without feeling too ill- unless like an esteemed individual of repute, you puke all over yourself and this writer’s car- down a good litre of water, and settle down to bed for that final session. This could range from a productive one, to one that involves sending another few crucial sms's to girls that really should have 'made a better effort to see you', or that 'you don't mind coming to fetch now quickly'.
This is just only an average Monday night of course- so please add some stories and stay tuned for the weekly update by any one of our correspondents or our resident residents Kichelle Daretti and Mim Bavel.
Send stories to firstname.lastname@example.org. Comments are welcome too!
Friday, August 10, 2007
Our friends over at Coed Magazine have alerted us to the fact that they have found a possible new entrant into the Daly Cup
Natalie Gulbis is a 24 year old professional golfer on the LPGA tour. She attended Granite Bay Highs School after which she moved on to Arizona Uiversity, but she calls Sacramento California home. I think we can all agree, that she is an absolute belter who could quite possibly outdrive King.
The competitions organisers however have decided not to issue her with an invitation to play, but rather have asked her to be support staff. This job entails driving around in a golf cart issuing players with refeshments and tending to their needs. She would of course have to do this wearing only a bikini (it would cost too much to get her naked). They have issued the invitaion but funnily enough, have not yet recieved a reply.
You can find out all about her on her website. She is not scared to do shoots in bikinis, and so she shouldn't be. Good girl, play nicely.
(click for bigger pics)